A few weeks ago Erin and I were discussing what would be good Christmas gifts for our 5, 7 & 12 year old children this year, and we honestly couldn’t come up with anything they “needed”. This was very evident to me when Jayla, the 5 yr old, answered someone’s question of what she wanted this year by saying, “well I don’t really need anything, but more Barbies would be ok”. She wasn’t the only one answering this way…Addison, the 12 yr old, fresh off of getting an xBox 360 for his Nov.30 birthday and Ivee, 7(8 in 2 weeks) both had given similar answers to those questioning them.
So, as parents, we had to decide are we going to add to the pile of “stuff” in their rooms, or do something different? We decided to do something different, and that is how we’ve all ended up on Allegiant Air Flight 854 to Florida. Not because we wanted to give them more “stuff” but instead hope to create a memory as a family. As a blended family we have to fight hard at times to feel like our own entity. This trip is more of a memory than a gift. I know that I get choked up thinking about how amamzing this will be for “us”. I gaurantee that I will be moved to tears multiple times as we walk the sidewalks of Magic Kingdom, Epcot, Hollywood Studios & Animal Kingdom, not because of the magic of Disney but because of the magic of my family.
Obviously I don’t want anyone to believe or think that I believe that memories from Disney are any better than something that we can do at home, but from the look in the kids eyes it is! I can’t explain it but I will revel in it…
Destination Disney
parenting…hold on for the ride
after a very fun weekend of birthday celebrations i sit here on monday with an odd feeling in my stomach. why? you ask, because we had to have a discussion about three little words that have hurt and helped so many over the years…
my parents ran a very tight ship as i grew up, just ask any of my friends from the indy city (my nickname for my hometown of indianola). i was grounded for all kinds of random things from saying shut-up or fart, to not wearing socks (i guess my feet really stunk in the boat shoes with the rolled laces). even my wife and i, when we dated in high school, had very strict alotted times for our phone conversations…because it was long distance? i don’t know, but it was 15 minutes and go. i know that i wasn’t the most rebellious kid, evident by the basement bedroom with a back door in it that i never snuck out of…but i did my share of stupid things, many of which came down to my use of words…one example flew to the front of my mind this weekend and instantly took me back to sixth grade and the feelings that i had then…
mrs. west (my 6th grade teacher) found a note that I had written to a female student. this letter contained the same three words from this past weekend’s discussion and she, much like i do as a parent, didn’t think it appropriate for a sixth grader to be using. so she called my parents, the girl’s parents and we all had a meeting in her room after school the following week…needless to say, i was humiliated and embarassed beyond anything else i can think of at the moment…the funny part is, i can’t remember the consequences for those three words and their inappropriate usage in the letter…which makes me hope that our discussion, how ever painful and embarassing will float to the back of someone’s head, and be thought about in the future but not dwelled on
in the age of cell phones and computers it isn’t as easy to say to your kids, “you have ___ minutes to talk to your friends on the phone tonight.” and be able to walk into the kitchen and point to the clock, raise your eyebrows and hear them say, “bye, i gotta go…talk to you at school tomorrow”. instead you have to have an agreement with them to able to read their text messages or emails at anytime…knowing full well, that any savvy kid will delete any incremenating evidence just as i would have as a kid myself…but sometimes you find something that has to be discussed
ultimately, we want that person to know that we love him, and have made mistakes ourselves…there are no words that can truly prepare anyone for parenting, it is the wildest ride that you’ll ever have that you don’t pay for…it’s like being forced to get on every roller coaster in an amusement park, having to give it a big hug and tell it you love it after it just made you throw up….don’t get me wrong, i love being a parent, but holy cow it isn’t always easy or scripted
i would have probably said that it was hard being 11, and it was not scripted or easy either…but i know that everything i learned, difficult or easy, has impacted who i am today…
so, if you have children, enjoy the wildest ride of your life…and if you don’t, there isn’t anything you can do to prepare because they are always building crazier roller coasters
the view from here…
i’m not exactly sure what i’m doing with this blog, but i think that i have some things that bump around in my head that need to get out. my hope is that this will give me a chance to share the things i observe, believe and desire for those that care to read it, or that it will allow me to sleep more soundly because those things won’t just be bouncing around and keeping me up…
my life has taken more turns than i ever would have expected, but all have ultimately led to my happiness and contentment with where i am….i’m not always joyful, but i am happy with where i am right now
